Virtual running with … growing boobs!!!

26 Jan

I’ve heard a lot of things in my life, some of it you wouldn’t believe yourself, once I’ve even heard something that sounded like: “darling, you are the only one, there will never be another”… go figure!
But it wasn’t until a couple of days ago when I’ve heard about VIRTUAL RACING (running races that is)… I mean don’t be so fast in judging me… I’ve heard about virtual things: virtual reality, or virtual life, virtual hug, virtual tourism or even virtual sex …., ok, ok tell me do you know what a virtual sheep is? Do you?

But,”virtual race” virtual running, ahhh my dreams are coming true, I would virtually win every single virtual race, out there, and how I would win it, in style people, in style and all the crowd will scream my name, time after time, and everyone around will have my picture on their t-shirts, a gigantic poster with me smiling will shadow half of the track…. while I wave to the crowd from the golden podium…

ON a not necessarily related development, let me tell you what I virtually did once, I must have been 12 years old, it was the first sunny warm day of spring, after a winter that felt longer than a day spent on a dentist chair. I was preparing to go out and play so I just grabbed a t-shirt I had from the year before, very excited that I get to play with my friends outside before doing my homework …… but ohhh, my excitement died sooner than the erection of a 14 year old in front of Angelina Jolie, before she married Brad……I saw myself in the mirror, and, there were this 2 bumps, strangely coming from the upper part of my t-shirt!!! I honestly thought it was part of the t-shirt first I really did … but then I realized, ohh mama what is this growing on my chest!!! Ohh my god what is wrong with me?

I ran in the bathroom too scared to cry, thinking about how to make it disappear, I blink my eyes twice like Samantha the witch but it didn’t work out, still there, I sat down in my knees praying to God: I promise it’s the last thing I am asking you my dear God, make it go please, it still didn’t work, so I took things in my own hands, as I do since then from time to time …. I took the bandana I was wearing on my head and desperately trying to tie it across my chest, and make a knot behind my back to hide the enemies …… but instead of disappearing, the bumps just moved upper…. I looked like Victoria Beckham in a good day, after a while I end it up on the floor, fighting the beasts…. don’t remember who won!!!

Anyway….. what a hell I was thinking!!!!

A lot of things have changed since then, now the only place I have the boobs I want is in a VIRTUAL reality!

24 Responses to “Virtual running with … growing boobs!!!”

  1. Ned's Blog January 28, 2013 at 3:23 pm #

    Your line about the 14-year-old and Angelina before Brad… Funny stuff🙂

    • H! January 28, 2013 at 5:17 pm #

      Thank you,thank you,can’t wait to see how she’ll look “after Brad”!!!:)

  2. We Are 2Fit2 Quit January 30, 2013 at 3:02 pm #

    Hilarious blog! Can’t wait to check out your other posts!

    • H! January 30, 2013 at 3:12 pm #

      Ohh thank you very much! Your “bumps” were in the wrong places in the before picture🙂, perfect locations in the after!!!!

  3. jalal michael sabbagh. January 30, 2013 at 7:29 pm #

    Delightful post .Wishing you success.jalal

  4. 8020sund January 31, 2013 at 8:41 am #

    Thank you for stopping by my blog. This is really funny:D I will be coming back!

    • H! February 4, 2013 at 5:16 pm #

      Thank you!’;)

  5. nasreenfynewever January 31, 2013 at 4:25 pm #

    Nice running blog, humorous, realistic, and motivating.

    • H! January 31, 2013 at 5:51 pm #

      Thank you so much, it’s not going to be only about running, but I hope I can keep it… “humorous, realistic and motivating”. Quite intrigued by your blog, I’ll explore it more.

  6. raeme67 February 1, 2013 at 10:08 pm #

    Ha! Ha! Love the ” I would virtually win every single virtual race, out there”-Your blog will now show up in my reader!

    • H! February 2, 2013 at 11:17 am #

      It seems like you don’t believe it, but it’s true, I would!!!🙂
      Thank you so much!!! And by the way , you do get a gold star from me!

      • raeme67 February 2, 2013 at 12:55 pm #

        Thanks for the gold star and I do believe you would win them all! 🙂

  7. jupiler1060 February 3, 2013 at 3:27 pm #

    Ooh, is that really you being interviewed there? I ran Bucharest too, but only the half!

    • H! February 3, 2013 at 3:50 pm #

      Ahhh I remember you, I spoke with you and your friend ( with the dreadlocks at the end of Bucharest marathon right????!!! Ahhh it’s a small world!!!
      I didn’t run that one, the picture with me being interviewed is from a completely different race! And I don’t run marathons only 10k or halfs!!!

      • jupiler1060 February 3, 2013 at 5:45 pm #

        Ah cool🙂 If we were practically on our knees looking like we were about to collapse, it very well could have been us😉

  8. H! February 3, 2013 at 5:50 pm #

    Ha ha ha … yes, yes in your knees, looking like you have been chased by a herd of alien tigers !!! 🙂

  9. ADVSponge February 6, 2013 at 5:19 pm #

    Thanks for stopping by my new blog!

    • H! February 6, 2013 at 8:18 pm #

      Thank you all the same!🙂

  10. genext13 February 11, 2013 at 5:07 pm #

    I find it interesting that you mentioned virtual sheep immediately after virtual sex (!). I think you have a beautiful body, particularly for a runner. Larger is not necessarily a blessing unless you like having black eyes.😉

  11. Overheard Productions (Billy FJ Quinn) March 9, 2013 at 9:17 pm #

    You had me at boobs*. No, really. You could be selling prosthetic hips in a lively range of new season pastels. Just mention boobs and….

    What was the question?!

    * My prudish dumb phone changed that to Boone. Pat or Daniel, that’s one effective cold shower.

    • H! March 10, 2013 at 11:19 am #

      Ha ha ha, boobs always impress men, it’s a fact!!!😉

  12. Insight March 28, 2013 at 3:09 pm #

    LAUGHING OUT LOUDS at your bumps on the chest!😀😉


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